The Edge Of Loss

I sit here typing away on a laptop, currently warm and sheltered from the cold outside. It may seem that all is well, but reality is a... Uh... Well, let's say that reality is not nice. Reality is a harsh wind in the face of a soft hope.

I could say a great deal about reality right now. I could rant and rail, which would be fitting for this blog I guess. I could complain, but who'd actually read the whole article at that point? No. Though I have one hundred and one things to say about reality, I'll stay quiet.

The truth is that reality has two edges. With one edge it cuts us deeply. With the other, it clears a path for us to walk. God's Word is indeed a lamp unto our feet, but I have noticed that God uses reality to make sure we're awake.

Wasteland Of Desperation

Courtesy of Freely Photos - Credit: Mohammad Alizade

As I sit here typing, I have a few tabs open in my browser. One is a job search. Yes, I have been placing applications. I average about five a day. I also call the companies where I've applied if I don't hear from them within seven days.

The rule I live by when seeking work is simple: "My future in God's hands, my resume in everyone else's." This is a great rule. It has worked well in the past. It is not working right now. In fact, I haven't worked steadily in over two years. That means that the rule hasn't worked for me in over two years.

I have worked some odd jobs here and there. Most have amounted to day labor. Due to God being good, my family has never wanted for a roof, food, warmth or transportation. Until now. Until this moment. This night when I stare total loss in the face and wonder what comes next.

Death Of The Faithful

My wife and I have had a faithful car for as long as we have been married, some four years now. It was her car before I married her. It has been a good car to us and our baby.

Last night, I lost reverse. Then I began losing speed. Our car sits outside tonight on life support. She is able to start. She is able to run. She is unable to keep going for much longer though. She is certainly unsafe for the daughter that so loves car rides. She is too wounded to be trusted with my wife.

Tomorrow, I will likely take her on one final drive. We will ride slowly with her hazard lights blinking away. I may or may not be crying. I know how silly that sounds.

Courtesy Free Images - Credit: Brian Tan

I will think of all the fond memories we have made with her. The night my wife and I made our way to the hospital. The day we returned with our daughter. The long road trip to New England to visit my family. Visits, long talks, earnest prayers, rehearsed lines for opening night... All within this faithful car.

Our destination will be the local Junk Car Medics. They will put money in my hands, and I will walk away. She will have made one final sacrifice for her family. I will feel like Judas.

Sour Hopes And Sick Hearts

My family lives in a studio apartment now. Two adults and one infant in an apartment the size of a modest motel room. We wait for red tape to be cleared elsewhere. At some point, my phone will ring. A friendly voice on the other end will tell me that my family and I can finally move. That we are finally fully funded.

Yet we have waited and waited. The phone does not ring. Our savings account drains and still the phone does not ring. I write articles to sell. I write more than I sell. Still the phone does not ring.

I forgot, I'm afraid. I forgot what it felt like to have hopes and dreams go sour. I forgot what it's like to have my heart become uncomfortable. Then spiral from discomfort to discouraged. From discouraged to agonized. From agonized, to sick.

Hopes held too closely ferment. When they are not kept properly, they grow old. They begin to wrinkle, peel and stink. At the height of their souring, they begin leaking. The toxin of the once promising hope begins to poison the heart. Naturally the heart grows ill.

Bait And Switch

Yesterday I was finally able to get a job. Sort of. It's on a day to day basis. Weather tends to affect the schedule. Temperature is an issue also. If things get too cold there can be no work. Yet income is income. I cannot afford to be proud.

I spoke with my future employer yesterday afternoon. I was on a hands-free device while driving. I was able to tell him that I had transportation. Then last night she began to die. Now we have to sell her for scrap.

Will I still have a job? I was supposed to start on Tuesday. I don't know what the day after tomorrow will bring. I hope to be working. I just have to get there.

The Meeting Place

Many paths meet on a dark desert night. That night is now. Will I be working on Tuesday? Will they buy our car tomorrow? Will disaster be avoided for another week? Or will rent go unpaid? Will we be sent over the edge of loss? 

I simply don't know. I know we are here in spite of all I've done. I know we still cling to hope. I know that dreams never really die. They mutate perhaps. Sometimes they become zombies and return to bite us. They never really die.

The biggest thing I have to remember is that more than problems meet here. This is the hard place where God's power crashes into the rock of troubles. When all is said and done, I know we'll be all right. I'm just convinced.

We'll be together in the meeting place. No more rock. No more hard place. No more blind curve in the road of life. We'll be beyond this trouble. There will be others to be sure. Each time, I know that we'll be there again. 

At the meeting place on the edge of loss.

[The second installment in what is becoming a series can be found HERE.]

My Hate Speech

This is my official proclamation on where I stand on other religions, beliefs and issues. Though I do not make fun of anyone, or slander anyone, you'll notice that my opinions are very pronounced. Since I do not believe that any human on this planet will EVER see heaven without first knowing God, through Jesus Christ as their Savior, well... You can call this my hate speech.


Baptist, Presbyterian, Methodist, etc.- All merely hold different views on our common beliefs. One Savior, born of a virgin, died as a sin sacrifice for all mankind, and rose again after three days in a tomb. He appeared to many people, eating with them even, and was taken up to Heaven in plain view of over a dozen witnesses. We believe He will return again in power and glory to take His people away prior to the destruction of the Earth. We believe that Jesus the Christ was the Son of God, and that the ONLY way to Heaven is through Christ.


Mormonism, Jehovah's Witness, Catholicism, etc.- All claim a form of Christ, but do not believe according to the Word of God.
Catholicism is really the only one that can swing both ways, as I know many proclaiming Catholics that truly do know Christ. However, I also know Catholics that do not know Christ as their Savior at all. They know Him as the figure on the cross and the traditions and religion make them feel they are doing something, makes them feel that they are earning their way to Heaven- It doesn't happen that way.

Catholics, Mary WAS NOT, IS NOT, and NEVER WILL BE holy, nor is she to be revered, nor is she to be deified. Her obedience should be admired, she was blessed certainly, and absolutely, she is a role model. But she is not the mother of God. She was the mother chosen by God. Saints are not meant to be worshiped, adored or prayed to. Icons are not meant to be revered, or worshiped.
These things are meant to be used, if you must, as aids of worship; Very much like a guitar, a hymnal or an organ. NOT to be revered. Frankly, they are going to hell if they do not trust Jesus Christ, ALONE, as their Lord and Savior.

Jehovah Witnesses are absolutely wrong in their beliefs. Great people, but dead wrong. There are so many issues I have with their beliefs, I really should not even begin right now. The idea that we are part of 44,000 JEWS is completely contradicted by the Bible. However, if we believe the literature of the Watch Tower, there are parts of the Bible that right, part of it that are wrong, and we are supposed to trust someone else to tell us which is which. Sadly, they are going to hell if they do not trust Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.

Mormonism is very much like Islam without the jihad. It was started by a drug addicted alcoholic who was having an ongoing affair on his wife. Only thing that didn't happen was the murderous rampage into the town that threw him out. However, to reduce Jesus to nothing more than a mortal who attained godhood is a slap in the face. To believe that MEN will eventually attain godhood also, provided that the right things are done, is foolish. To tell women that they are just as equal as men, when the actual belief states that women will spend the after life serving man-gods also makes all who recruit for this false religion liars.
The truth is, they are going to hell if they do not trust Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.


Islam is also a false belief. Something that political correctness refuses to do is tell the truth. Thus, I am being totally and completely politically incorrect when I say that they are misguided, misdirected and misinformed. It too was formed by a drug addicted alcoholic who had an affair with the wife of the towns ruler. Only difference here is that several years after being thrown out, this man came back and killed every member of the town except the wife- she he married.
There is no Allah, unless you are going with the literal translation which is "One God." Then, you would have to use it as a term in reference to Jesus Christ. However, they DO NOT consider Christ holy, merely a great prophet. They believe that Allah allowed His death upon the cross for attempting to claim godhood, and they do not believe He rose from the dead.
However, there is only ONE way to Heaven, it is Jesus Christ. You will not have 72 virgins, but you will have eternal life. There will never be a Heavenly reward for blowing oneself up. God hates murder, and wholesale murder is just not going to get around that.
I know a few Muslims, they are wonderful people, occasionally we talk, sometimes debate, religion, but they are going to hell if they do not trust Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.


Satanist, Wiccan, Witch, Pagan, etc. Hell is NOT a party. You will not drink the blood of Christians from their skulls. "Mother Nature" DID NOT create God, nor is it god. There IS NO GODDESS. Satan will not rise up and strike God down, nor will goddess Gaia strike down those who do not believe. You have no power but that which is given you. You are given it for as long as you are of use to Satan, and he WILL destroy you when you are of no further use. The ONLY way to stop this from happening is to renounce your sinful life and accept Christ's sacrifice on the cross. Renounce the dark lord, and make Him Lord of your life.
I have a few friends who fall into this category. Good people, but if you do not do this, you are going to hell.


Atheist, Maltheist, Hedonist, Agnostic, etc. There is a God and there is a Devil. There is a Heaven, and there is a Hell. You are not the end of all things, and you DO NOT control your own future. Granted, your decisions are your own, but they have already been seen by God, and have been planned on accordingly so His perfect will comes to pass. God IS NOT evil. He will allow hardship and tragedy but He IS NOT the source of the pain. He is a God of ORDER, not a God of CHAOS. Carnal pleasure IS NOT a means of worship, nor are any of your fleshly desires.
I know several folks who fit in this category and while I enjoy these people, they are going to hell if they do not trust Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.


Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual. You WERE NOT born this way. There are genes in each person that dictate whether a man will be more effeminate, and whether a woman will be more masculine, however- NO ONE IS BORN HOMOSEXUAL. This lifestyle is wrong, you are living in sin, and while God will take you where you are at, He WILL NEVER tell you it is all right to continue living this lifestyle. Anyone who HAS told you this has done you a disservice.
----->----->A Side-note to homosexual clergy: YOU ARE WRONG!!!! You are living in sin, you are leading your flocks into sin and you are damning yourselves and others. Listen carefully, you snakes and vipers- should you continue, and die in this transgression, THERE WILL BE NO MERCY FOR YOU on the day of judgment.
I have several gay friends and a couple of lesbian friends, as well as a few bi friends and family, and I love them all dearly. I have seen a couple turn from their wickedness, but sadly, the others are going to hell if they do not trust Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.


Democrat, Republican, Independent, etc. No, not one person will ever go to hell because of their party affiliation. However, you politicians. Your actions are watched and weighed and recorded. There will be a final day of reckoning for ALL mankind, and no diplomatic immunity, no political privilege, no special interest will bail you out. Even if you ARE a believer, you WILL have to answer for your decisions, because they SHAPED A COUNTRY.
YES, it matters if a politician has an affair. Yes, it matters if they are flamboyantly homosexual. (Barney Frank- Hell is paging.) Yes, it matters if he has had sex while on the job! (Bill Clinton? Seating for one in the lake of fire.)
---->---->Side-note to the President off the United States: Quite playing with fire, Mr. President. Israel is to be an ally at any cost. Look at the time line, sir, and tell me it isn't frightening that with each major departure from good standing with them, there is a corresponding natural disaster. You claim to be a Christian, and yet your actions of late have shown there to be little fruit. You claim a form of Christianity, Mr. President, and with all due respect, you will be one of the goats lest you change your ways. America will not go down because of you, sir, but America will watch your fall. It has already begun... Are you too blind to see it?
My examples, I'm sure, are nice people, with hopes and dreams for the future, and I'm sure we could find common ground. However, they are going to hell if they do not trust Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.


Pro-choice, Pro-abortion... Any who willingly and knowingly support abortion with the knowledge of what it truly is- YOU ARE MURDERERS. You kill innocent children; The most defenseless and frail humans on earth, and you destroy them for profit. Exorbitant profit. You claim that an abortion on a five month pregnant woman removes "tissue," yet if that same woman were killed by a drunk driver, he'd face two counts of negligent homicide. He did not intend to kill anyone, but you PLAN these out, scheduling them, deciding upon the best form of murder. You doctors are cold, merciless, serial killers. FACE THE TRUTH. CONFESS YOUR SIN. If you do not, you are going to hell.

Pro-life Those of you who block entrances, grab onto women, kill doctors and bomb clinics, listen to me: YOU ARE JUST AS EVIL AS THOSE YOU HARM! Being dragged away from a door does not make you a hero, but a fool. Being arrested for obstructing a women from her legal rights does NOT make you a martyr, but a moron. You who would kill doctors, you are not children of God, but of Satan. You who would bomb clinics, you are monsters- More so than those you bomb! God does NOT look with favor upon any of you! You do not glorify Him with your words or your actions, and as such you are shaming Him. REPENT!


Beastials, pedo- and necrophiliacs Not going into great detail here. Your actions are an abomination before the Lord, and those currently living this way- You are damned. Repent of your sin, seek accountability for your crimes... IT IS NOT TOO LATE to begin anew. Heed this warning, for you are going to hell if you do not trust Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior.


Non-Christians, anti-Christians Take a lesson from Rome. The more Christians you kill, brutalize, terrorize, harass or persecute, the more converts will be added to our number. You cannot stop God, nor can you be successful against His people. You may cut one down, but there will be ten in their place. Heed the warning.

Christians Let's Get Off Our Butts! The world is not saving itself, and people are going to hell by the millions. Stop bellyaching. Stop procrastinating. Stop complaining. Get out there and DO! The worst they can do is take our life- But we gave our life to God, so we've got NOTHING TO LOSE. If we continue to make excuses, we've got something to lose, and God's got something He isn't pleased with. We must examine ourselves carefully should we feel hesitant to witness- Nothing should stop us from sharing His Gift.



I'm sure there will be more to follow this later, but for right now, I think I've pissed off enough people. I know many, many people who fit into all these categories, and while I'm very accepting of them as people, they ARE going to hell, if Christ is not their Lord and Savior. Tiptoeing around the Truth will only get them more lost and you and I into trouble with the Almighty.


I do welcome your thoughts.

Philao~
RETS

Praying Through It

Ever had something that just nags at you and won't leave you alone? A fear? A doubt? How about sadness or anger? Despair?

Very often, I've had this happen. I'll have something such as the emotions and mindsets listed above pester me and refuse to leave me alone. Nothing I can do will stop it. No matter how I read, who I talk to or what I listen to, it just refuses to leave me alone.

There will be some people who'll tell you, in this situation, to take time for yourself. Others will tell you that now you need to lean on friends more than ever. Still others will tell you that you're not in the right place with God. They'll all tell you to pray.

Any of these groups could be right. Sometimes you need time alone, sometimes you need others support, and finally yes, you could have moved out of God's will for your life.
However, something that they all hint at is the need for prayer. The problem is, that prayer for this sort of thing is not meant to be a short prayer said over your Bible, meal or pillow. It calls for far more.

These nagging thoughts and feelings call for us to PRAY THROUGH.

Daniel had many instances where things came up and plagued his mind and the only way he was able to receive relief was through seeking God.

Praying something through. Sometimes, it requires us to get alone with God; Sometimes, it's best to involve others; Still other times, we should begin with fervent repentance.
Nevertheless, the key to it all is the will to stay upon our knees until the burden lifts or we are answered.

This means that we need to put out of our way anything and everything that requires our attention other than God. This is not the time for casual interaction- We are coming before the King of the universe with a passionate petition.

How heavy is your burden? Our Savior's was so great His sweat was as blood. Daniel's was over what he'd read. Their response was the same- Intense prayer. Daniel fasted and sat in sackcloth and ashes. Christ bled from His pores. Both Prayed until something happened.


We have become lax in this area. How often do we pray through our problems? How often do we pray until something happens- whether that be an angel's ministry, or a feeling of peace; An audible answer, or a timely word from another servant of the Lord, we need to learn again how to pray things through.

I have recently been learning to do this. It's different. It's frightening. It'll put you in a place where you have no control over your own life.
And it'll be the greatest feeling in the world. When God has control over every aspect within your life, things begin to take place. Healing in your own life and others. You'll have visions and dreams but most importantly- You'll feel free to be about what God tells you to do, because HE provides your every need.


I encourage you all to take the first step in this life of complete and utter dependence on the Lord... Pray through your issues and problems, the ones that plague you- And see what happens.


Philao~
Andrew

The I.C.C.

Inescapable Christian Cowards.

We are not like the world. We run from anything that could get us into trouble, but would be a lot of fun to do. What cowards we are.
There are so many things that we DON'T do, and so many thing that we DO, that the world in general looks at us and utters a collective, "Huh?!"

WHY don't Christians participate in certain activities- seances, orgies, Mardi Gras?!
WHY when they finally DO something fun, do Christians ask forgiveness from people around them- And then from thin air?!
WHY, WHY, WHY do Christians get so worked up over gay marriage, prostitution, drugs, etc.?

These things are all harmless fun when done in the right manner! Gay deserve to be able to marry- Why are Christians so afraid of change?
Why shouldn't prostitution be legal- at least in some places? If it's what they want to do, if they have fun doing it, and if others are getting use from it, why not?
Why shouldn't Weed be legalized? It relaxes you, it calms you down... And if you want to go with a Christian argument, God created everything, right? So... Why not?

These are arguments I, and I'm sure you as well, have heard before. The fact that we oppose these things marks us a wimps, or cowards. We are "afraid" of change, "afraid" of fun, and "afraid" of all the "good" things in life.

For instance:

*We Flee Temptation
Drinking, smoking, promiscuity, pornography... All "good" things, and all things that we openly and loudly decry as wrong. These are things that we run from.
There are other things that are more personalized, such as dancing, certain music, films, etc. Personal preference issues that all add up to being completely and totally wimpy.

*Fear Of Change
Gay marriage? Abortion? Legalized prostitution?
All issues that we, again, loudly and strongly oppose. To see these issues come back so often and with so much support often makes us publicly wonder what is happening to our country. When these issues are brought up again and again, we question the moral fabric of the citizenry as a whole.
Our apparent "judgmental attitude" comes across as the fear of change, and there are examples throughout history tossed in our faces to illustrate that point. Salem Witch Trials, anyone?

*Fear Of Consequences
Whenever we fail our standards, we ask forgiveness from God. They see us praying and wonder why. What we did was merely fun, and we only live once- So why regret?
I have a few regrets, yes. But for the most part, I do not regret anything. All that I have gone through has molded me into who I am today, and I am a better man because of my own mistakes, and the consequences I have suffered.
However, the world sees our conviction from the Holy Ghost as guilt or regret. They don't understand this, in many cases.
Consequences are part of the natural order, but it shouldn't keep you from trying new things, in their minds. Plus, our insistence that there is much more to fear then what we receive on this planet is often viewed as a paranoid delusion formed to fortify our own fear.

Gentle As A Lamb, Wily As A Snake.
Often, our calling to be meek and gentle is misinterpreted as cowardice. Our calling to be smart and strategic is seen as subversive.
The world does not understand the concept of "turn the other cheek" in the same manner as we do. While many Christians take this expression to a wholly different extreme, our understanding is very much the same.
The Golden Rule only remains in effect until someone is in the wrong- then it is replaced with "an eye for an eye."
Our understanding is that when someone wrongs us, we forgive, and move on- If at all possible, treating the offending party no differently. If not possible, we take this rule to mean that we speak no evil against them, and pray for them.
Still, the world in general does not understand how we can wish good for someone who has done us wrong.
Our call to be "wily as a snake" often puts us at odds with governments that attempt to stop the spread of the Gospel. When we smuggle Bibles, walk backwards through the snow, meet as a church body, in worship, when the law specifically states otherwise, we are viewed as subversive. This is also a form of cowardice, in the eyes of many.


These are the reasons we are known as cowards. Cowards that walk up to complete strangers, telling them about the Love of an Almighty God, about Hell, and about the Salvation Story.

I am indeed a coward, because I refuse to deal with the consequences of NOT obeying my God.

This is why the world is so stunned when we Jesus Freaks are so passionate in our persecution. When we Freaks are mutilated, tortured, starved, imprisoned and/or murdered.
We are so "cowardly" in other areas of life, why, HOW, can we suddenly bear these horrors and NOT curse our tormentors; Not deny our beliefs; not do ANYTHING that would ease our suffering.

It is at this time, in this instant of ultimate courage in the midst of ultimate torment, that they begin to see our cowardice as courage- And all that we have said suddenly begins to make sense.


Are you among the ranks of the ICC?